My Kitchen Story
by DannyUK
This post is an entry for the “My Kitchen Story” Linky Challenge, sponsored by Fairy Platinum”
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I’ve laughed in my kitchen.
Cried.
Rolled my eyes and sighed.
I’ve cooked and burnt, experimented and learnt.
The fridge has been filled from bottom to tail,
sometimes with vegetables, often with ale.
The cooker is cleaned (though not really used),
the microwave’s knackered and likely to fuse.
The pots and pans sparkle looking brand new and nice,
They’re many years old but have been used maybe twice.
My kitchen is tiny, I can touch all four walls,
with my bum in the sink and the fridge near my balls.
But I wouldn’t change it, and I don’t mean to be rude,
but so what if I cook only microwave food?
For five days a week I’m a lone single lad,
it’s only weekends I act like a dad.
I pretend on a Friday I don’t find veg vile,
(if the kids only knew Pizza Hut’s on speed dial)
That stain on the side? It’s overcooked peas!
I won’t ever admit it’s just spilt Chinese.
That mark over there was when I cooked in a hurry
Though there’s a reason it resembles some dried out old curry.
It matters to no-one, doesn’t matter a jot.
I’m king of my kitchen if you like it or not.
I got a free trial of Fairy Platinum to try
and with all things considered it’s a bloody good buy.
But not for me, despite the best wishes
You can’t wash up microwave meal dishes
So I gave it to mum in an unselfish manner
Now she includes me when making lasagne
Cos she knows if nothing else, the washing up’s done
Thanks to Fairy Platinum (and her gift-giving son)
This post is an entry for the “My Kitchen Story” Linky Challenge, sponsored by Fairy Platinum” who can be found on Facebook at Facebook.com/fairydish

My kitchen - As small as it is rarely used.
Twitter: sitstillmonkeys
on June 30, 2014 at 10:15 pm
Love it Danny! Very good 😉
Jo Laybourn recently posted…The Incredible Lifecycle Of A Butterfly!
Thank you Jo!
DannyUK recently posted…Get up and go Travelodge – Liverpool Central
Twitter: kateonthinice
on June 30, 2014 at 10:21 pm
Enjoyed your fun and very real poem. Commenting for myself and on behalf of BritMums and thanking your for taking part
kateonthinice recently posted…Family fun at Warwick Castle – Competition
Thank you 🙂
DannyUK recently posted…Get up and go Travelodge – Liverpool Central
That is brilliant, perfectly written!
Moolboots recently posted…My Kitchen Story
BritMums inspired you indeed 🙂 This is so much fun to read. Love its honesty too, especially about the pizza on speed dial – we often speak quietly to the takeaway when our son is asleep in case we wake him and he wants to know why he’s not allowed to join in! Glad I found you #Prose4T
Emily Page recently posted…Words
Too funny and nicely written, I enjoyed it! Found you at Wake Up Wednesdays and now following on FB. 🙂
Bernadyn recently posted…4th of July Treats and Decorations
Haha,love this. We go through phases of being all good and healthy and then times of takeaways and beans on toast. I hope your Mum likes the washing up liquid! x found you on #prose4t
There’s nothing wrong with beans on toast! Especially just before payday when you’re skint 😉
DannyUK recently posted…Google Ads – How to hide blog adverts!
Love it! Do we get to vote in this challenge? This gets my vote. 🙂 I often tell my family they need to stop eating stuff because they are making too much washing up, but I guess the key is to stop cooking.
Judith recently posted…My Parents’ Kitchen
Twitter: _lisaslife_
on July 6, 2014 at 3:23 pm
Flipping brilliant, made me giggle 🙂
Lisa from Lisa’s Life recently posted…Silent Sunday: 6th July 2014
Twitter: vicwelton
on July 9, 2014 at 2:00 pm
I UTTERLY love it!! You are a definite poetic talent and you need to keep writing this type of thing. Good luck with the competition, I have my figures crossed for you. Thanks for linking to Prose for Thought 🙂
Verily Victoria Vocalises recently posted…A Review of Softub – the hot tub with a difference!