Wednesday Whinge - Coffee shops
Just what we need. Another alliterated blog meme. Yes, Wednesday Whinge.
Iâm sure itâs already been done a thousand times, but itâs an apt title given the day and the fact that Iâm whinging. Had it been yesterday it would have been Tuesday Tantrum.
Todayâs whinge is a simple one. Unstable tables. Why is it that major chain coffee shops (and Iâm looking squarely at you, Costa and Starbucks) canât use tables that sit squarely on the floor?
I canât count the amount of times that Iâve sat down, placed my coffee on the table and a butterfly has passed by fifty yards away, the force from the beating of its wings sending my table rocking and dumping 30p worth of coffee across the saucer and table (on a good day) or splattered across my shirt and down my crotch (on a normal day).
Let me tell you this: there is no way to walk anywhere with your head held high when you have a damp groin. Try it.
The problem is caused by the insistence of having tables with a wide bottom (quiet at the back there) and one supporting central leg. It encourages instability, much the same way as not calling a girl when you say you will does.
Is it a clever ploy by the coffee companies? A way of making a little more money by keeping us all a little thirstier? âYou may have paid for a Grande Latte, Mr Customer, but weâll make sure you dump an espressoâs worth everywhere as you sit down. Then youâll be back for more. BwahahahaaaaaâŚâ
Perhaps itâs done so that people move on quicker? Iâm happy to spend ÂŁ2.65 on a coffee and sit in the same seat for two hours, but when Iâm sitting there staring at a pool of cold coffee Iâm more inclined to move on after half an hour. Christ knows that the coffee shop staff wonât clear the mess up while Iâm sitting there.
Or maybe the companies just arenât aware of the problem. Maybe not one customer has complained. Maybe the staff on each and every coffee shop just think that customers are extremely accident prone.
So please, Costa. Pretty please Starbucks. Take this blog entry as a complaint. A show of dissatisfaction. A small cry for help.
Fix your tables.
Allow me the pleasure of being able to drink ÂŁ2.65 worth of overpriced warm, flavoured milk. Save yourself several napkins for every customer. Give me no reason to use a title as crappy as âWednesday Whingeâ. We can all be winners if you do.
Note to self: âWednesday Winnersâ â now THEREâS a blog entry title to be proud of.