Note to self: when taking your laptop to Starbucks with the sole intention of using it to blog, ensure the bloody thing is charged, otherwise you end up blogging on your phone which is on it’s last legs and is liable to lose everything you write.

In fact, the phone is in such a bad way right now that I daren’t write too much when using it to browse the internet as it jumps out of the browser and I lose what I’ve written.

In fact, merely receiving text messages on the bloody thing has caused it to spasm into a twenty second vibrate and then rebooting itself at least three times a day recently.

I’m sure the bloody thing is pre-programmed to fuck up. The 18 month contract is up and I can renew, and it started going wrong in the last three months of the contract.

I did get round to sorting out a new phone. The LG Viewty Smart, which I’ve been looking at for a while.

I ordered it, it got delivered, I spent a few hours playing with it, only to find that I hated the bloody thing.

The touch screen was ropey, and hard to use, meaning texting was a pain in the backside. It also didn’t have an option to lock the keypad when taking a call, which meant that the touchpad rested against your ear which in turn pressed buttons and cut out your voice mid-sentence.


Lastly, I couldn’t get the Geocache software to work on it. So twelve hours after unpacking the phone it was on its way back to Orange.

Unfortunately I’m now stuck as to what to get. I quite like the look of the Nokia N97, but Orange don’t offer it for some reason.

I also quite fancy the iPhone, but that’s only on O2 at the moment, and I hate them for fucking me about a few years ago.

There’s talk of the iPhone being made available on all networks soon, but I don’t know when or if this will happen. Until then I’m stuck with this N95 which I doubt will last much longer.

In other news, I’m feeling ever so slightly like I have sold my soul to the devil. Yes, that’s a bit of an extreme way to put things, but I can’t think of a better way to describe it. I’ve decided to take a job back at the bank.

It’s out on the road, collecting money, which is what I was doing before I went on garden leave. It’s a CAM role, which is a step down from the manager role I was doing, but I’m told it will be "ring-fenced" so I will get the same salary and car benefits as I did before, though seemingly with less responsibility.

The only downside I can see is that I will be getting a CAMs bonus instead of a Managers bonus, but seeing as I rarely earnt any bonus in the months leading up to leaving, I’m not overly fussed. Oh, and I lose out on the redundancy pay out, obviously.

That said, it’s a job. And in this climate I’m quite grateful. There’s not many jobs out there that I’d choose to do, and the ones I did fancy I didn’t get when I applied for them. This way I also have continuity which could help with the mortgage, and if the bank does close next year, as expected, I’ll get redundancy then anyway, and possibly another ninety days garden leave.

Overall though I suspect that I have just taken the job as it’s the easiest thing to do. The cowards way out. I could be looking to do something different, to be taking the redundancy and using it wisely, or eeking it out while I do a lower paid job, but I haven’t. I guess rather than feeling as though I’ve sold my soul, I just feel disappointed with myself.

I’m sure it’ll pass. I’ll be working areas around home (Chelmsford, Colchester, Southend and Basildon) which is better than trekking into North London every day.

I do feel as though I should be looking to gain a qualification though. To use this next year to become qualified as in Independent Financial Advisor, for example. I just need to sort out exactly what I want to do.

The last thing to add is that the BBC turned down the reworking of the script again, not that the decision suprised me. It’s a shame as it was definitely improved on last time, but hey ho. I’ve seen an advert looking for radio scripts, so I may amend it slightly and put it forward for that, as although it doesn’t pay it’d be nice to get my name out there.

The comedy writing course starts at the end of this month which I’m equally looking forward to and dreading. Experience tells me that I’ll probably be the quiet one making glib remarks at the back of the room, which is the role I’ve always played whenever in a room with a bunch of sales colleagues that I don’t know too well, preying on the idiocy of the more stupid ones, and shyly trying to impress the attractive ones. Christ, it’ll be like being back at school!

As I mentioned before, I’ve signed up with Alan and his mate James. I don’t know if either one of them are really looking forward to it or not, though I have detected apathy in Alan’s attitude towards it in the past. Perhaps I should be looking to do something more worthwhile?

A career in IT is something I’ve always fancied, though I’d never be able to start on lower level wages again. That, or finance, which can quite frankly be boring.

I get the feeling I’ll be fifty years old and still not know what I want to do in life!

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