Ever since I realised last year that I could access the internet using my phone, I’ve used it all the time during the day whilst at work.

I started on a 30mb bundle which the phone monkey at Orange told me quite confidently “would never get used up in a month”. Obviously she was wrong as three weeks later I was close enough to the limit that I had to stop using it.

A month or two later Orange were offering a 300mb per month bundle for £6.50, so ten times as much access and it was a round cheaper. I jumped at this and have been happily wearing out the buttons on my phone by Facebooking and updating LiveJournal from work.

Recently though I’ve had some problems. I’ll be happily tapping out a massive long rant about something and all of a sudden the phone will jump out of the internet page completely, meaning everything I’ve written is lost forever.

After happening a few times, I decided to call Orange. Their first answer was that it was due to a faulty 3G mast in the area. Unlikely, if you ask me, that this problem will be caused by that, but despite my protestations, I agreed to give it a few hours.

The next day I was still having the same problem, so I called them again. I went through to a different person at the call centre and explained my problems. After checking that it was happening on lots of different websites (which she asked about half a dozen times) she raised a log for the technical team, saying they’d call me back that afternoon.

The next day, which was Saturday, I called to chase it through and was told, again, that it was with the tech team, this time though I was told to call them back if I hadn’t heard anything by the afternoon. Thinking that it was a bit of a cheek to make me run around, I agreed anyway and left it. No call.

Eventually Wednesday rolls around and I decide to call them again. Still with the tech team, apparently. Not sure how long it must take them to read the request and call me, but fine. I tell the phone monkey that I’m pissed off with waiting, she agrees it’s bad but that she’ll get someone to call me back “straight away”. Brilliant. Not being as dumb as I look, this time I take her name and lo and behold, someone called me ten minutes later. Ok, the someone wasn’t from the tech team (in fact it was the same person whose name I’d taken) but the upshot was that she needed to find out what version of the phone software I was using, and when she found out she told me that I needed to update it. This can’t be done from the phone itself, so I had to wait until I got home to hook it up to the pc.

So at 6.30 this morning I was upgrading my phone software. There’s a cursory note on the site that you need to back up your phone data, though it’s in no way written in such a way that you’d lose everything if you didn’t. Again, though, not as dumb as I look, so I backed my stuff up anyway, having had plenty of experience of pc’s chewing up and throwing away important stuff.

Once I’ve backed up, I upgrade the phone software. To no-ones surprise, everything on the phone is lost. Fuckers. There should definitely be a big “BACK UP YOUR PHONE BEFORE UPGRADING THE SOFTWARE OR YOU WILL LOSE EVERYTHING” sign on their website somewhere. Still, I connected the phone again and reinstalled the back up. Everything’s back on my phone. Except text messages. And my calender. Bugger. I do it again. Same result. I factory-reset it and try again. Same thing. The annoying thing is that you can pick and choose what sections you want to back up. One of the sections covers two bits “notes” and “calender”. The notes are there but the calender isn’t, and I store all my important notes in the calender as I can set it to remind me with alarms.

So. Orange are cunts. I’ve called them and logged another error with the tech team but hold out little hope of getting anything back. If I forget your birthday this year. Or don’t turn up to a meeting. Or forget to order tickets. In fact, any fault of mine, going forward, is being blamed on the lack of a calender.

On the plus side, if you’re reading this, it hasn’t kicked me offline!

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